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Dear Dr. Faith,

I am a high-level female executive in a major corporation Despite setbacks and challenges, I've risen to the in a dominant male culture. Many women ask the secret of my success. Here are some tips I've learned along the way.

1. Speak up.

Take risks. Have an opinion. When you believe in an idea - put it out there. Don't wait to be asked. Guys don't solicit each other's opinions. You have to jump in. The best meeting I ever had was with the VP of manufacturing when he grilled me up one side and down the other. I earned his respect by standing my ground and advocating what I believed.

2. Don't take criticism personally.

When you are criticized or attacked, don't take it personally. Ask questions. Try to understand the other's point of view. Realize there's always a grain of trust in every criticism. Don't hold a grudge, it only hurts you.

3. Excel at your job.

Learn your profession. Be superb. Always keep learning. Strive to be at the top of your game. Don't just do your job. Have new ideas. Look for solutions. Imagine what could be better and propose it. Sell your ideas.

4. Delegate.

It took me a long time to learn this skill. You can't move up without good people supporting you. Hire the best, give them clear goals, and stay out of their way. Learn to trust and rely on others!

5. Enjoy people.

Good relationships are essential to success. Pay attention to the little things. Initiate acts of kindness. Say ‘thank you' often. Give credit. Appreciate others' unique gifts and talents.

6. Don't try to be ‘one of the guys.'

Be yourself. Let others know the real you. Define success on your own terms. Add your own personal flare to the job.

Dear Smarting,

Thank for sharing your insights and wisdom. Many will benefit from these tried-and-true ideas!

Dear Dr. Faith,

My boss is a micro manger. She checks and edits everything I do. I feel completely under her thumb. I've afraid of making a mistake. My confidence is going down the tubes. How can I get her to back off and let me do my job?

Dear Peace Seeker

How long have you worked for this manager? Two weeks or two years can make a big difference in the amount autonomy you're given. Or your boss may be responding to pressure from her boss to ‘stay on top of things.

Initiate a conversation and tell your manager that you appreciate her support and desire for success. Also tell her you're uncomfortable with the amount of detail she asking for and you'd like more autonomy.

Ask if she would be willing to work with you to free you both up. Describe the benefits to her. She'll gain more time and feel less distracted. Talk about the benefits for you. You'll learn more and gain confidence.

Agree on specific areas where you can take charge. Clarify when you'll check in with her, provide progress reports and ask for help. Discover what she needs to feel safe and let go of these projects. Gain agreement to learn from mistakes instead of going back to old patterns of control and monitoring.

Gradually expand your areas of accountability using these guidelines. Recognize that it can be frightening to delegate. She's committing her success and reputation into your hands.

Dear Dr. Faith,

I'm a computer system analyst who's under employed. I'm totally bored with my job. All day I put out fires and respond to crises. I'm afraid to leave because at least I have a job. What can I do to stay sane?

Dear ‘Geek,'

There are always new things coming down the pike. Keep an eye out for cross-functional projects that might be interesting to you. You won't be considered a good candidate for a new job unless you're doing an exceptional job where you are.

If the job market opens up, look around. Otherwise, sit tight and look for business issues your skills can solve. Learn about problems down and upstream from your area.

Don't get so bogged down that you don't have time to reach out, connect and learn what's happening. See the big picture and you'll be the first to spot emerging needs and opportunities.

Topics

• Developing Women Leaders